Question:
and yet manage to maintain a sense of balance. You have every right to get angry. You are so ill yourself but still you remain strong. You are in my prayers. — : ) Mrs. 9 Cats Everything I know I learned from Mr. Spock – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I just wanted to say thanks to everyone. I appreciate your response, > your support and well-wishes. I get so pissed off sometimes, and I > need to blow off that steam and rant and rave. I know it doesn’t do > much good, but it makes me feel a little better. And not only that, it > is kind of nice to know that my anger is pretty justified. When the > steroids are kicking up, I can’t always tell if I’m being reasonable > or not! > But I thought I ought to also mention a few things. > Yes, I do have help. I have a super lady who comes in 4 days a week > for about 5 hours a day. During that time, she takes care of dad and > does some housework as well. She has even helped me do a little > cooking, though I generally like doing that myself. > As to other help — well, insurance is not going to provide any help > because they say my dad does not need "skilled nursing" care. In case > you’re wondering, that means that he doesn’t need someone to > adminsiter medicine or medical treatment. As to local agencies that > can help on an income-based fee schedule, well, I would have to pay > the agency more than I’m paying my super lady now, and she would end > up getting less from the agency than I’m paying her if she worked for > them. Not only that, but the agency would say that she couldn’t do any > cleaning in the kitchen because me and my brother also live in the > house. They would probably say she couldn’t do anything in the > bathroom since my dad really can’t go to the bathroom anymore and so > only me and my brothers use it now. I know all this because I used to > have someone from the agency. So basically I would have to pay more to > get less, and the person who did the actual work would get almost as > much less as I would be paying extra! The sad thing is that I wish I > could pay the lady more — she deserves it, but even at her current > pay, we have more money going out each month than is coming in. > Fortunately we have some extra because my brother had to buy the house > from dad so that we could make sure it couldn’t be taken away from us > if dad were to go to a nursing home. Actually, I think we’d be okay > financially if me and my brother contributed more to the whole > she-bang, but I’m not going to do that until he’s willing to match me, > and that’s not going to happen until we’re flat broke. It’s not that > he’s a miser, but ask him to take a little responsibility and he’ll > tell you that he pays the cable bill already, thank you very much! But > since he’s the one who has digital cable and a cable modem, then he > should! > And we actually have a pretty equitable system set up for most times. > I do all the shopping and cooking, I watch dad after our lady leaves > and I have him all day Friday to get up and bathe and whatnot; my > brothers usually bring dad into the kitchen for supper and then put > him in bed afterwards, they split the weekend days to get him up and > watch him, my brother who lives here takes care of all the yardwork, > the laundry and the vacuuming. I get to do dishes sometimes, but the > brother who doesn’t live here does dishes when he and his new bride > eat here and watch dad. The only problem I’ve really had in that > situation is that the one brother will go out and do yard work on his > day to take care of dad, expecting me to take him to the pot even > though it’s his day. And the other brother has this annoying tendency > to decide he has to go somewhere and leave dad to us on his day, but > I’m really going to put my foot down on that one, because it’s just > not fair to me or my other brother, though I’m usually the one who > gets the worse of it. The other problem I’ve had is that since school > has stopped for the summer, the weight training schedule that my > brother has for the kids playing football has changed to later, so I > am not having to get dad into the table and then into bed two nights a > week in addition to everything else. On the few nights that I’ve tried > to get dad to eat in his room or sit up until my brother gets home, > he’s been a sorry bastard about it! Oh, he was actually good for me > over the weekend, but that’s almost as bad since unless I get > something he can pick up to eat, I have to feed him if he doesn’t come > to the table. We make sure that he has biscuits and sandwiches for > breakfast and lunch. > So, we really don’t have a bad arrangement, except that right now I’m > sick and I’m getting no acknowledgement that I can’t do all the things > I usually do — in fact, things have actually gotten worse in that > regard. But then to pull this latest stunt — to leave me alone with > dad on the two days of the week that I have been spending in bed > trying to recuperate, when they both know I’m having trouble eating > solid food … it just doesn’t make any sense to me. I wouldn’t do > that to anyone! I mean, I want you to get this — Tuesday evening is > Robbie’s night to watch dad. Well, he put dad to bed and then went > home to pack for the beach, he didn’t stay and give dad his medicine > or anything else he might need before he went to sleep. Well, I had > already decided that I was going to see Scoobie Doo that night since > he was supposed to be here and my other brother would be there too. > When I found out just before I left to make the picture, I actually > felt guilty about leaving the one brother there alone with dad for the > two hours. I mean, I don’t like to go anywhere when there’s only one > of them there because I like to make sure they have back-up. Not that > they’d think twice about that with me. > I mean, in all fairness, I plan to take at least a week and go off and > enjoy myself, too. But they’ll have the two of them to manage for that > week, as well as the lady coming in. I just don’t understand. And I > can’t help but think that I’m not ever going to get any better because > every time I start to feel better, I have to go do stuff and wear > myself out and put myself back in bed. One step forward and one step > back! I have to wonder if how much better I would be doing if they > would just give my body the chance to get some rest and heal. > And, of course, if I could get my Remicade, most of this would be a > moot point. I mean, if I were in remission, then I might still be > irritated at them about a few things, but I could handle it. Of > course, then they’d probably bitch about me having to run off to get > my treatments once a month! I arrange them for Friday, so I leave > Thurdsay evening and come back Sunday after spending the weekend with > friends who live much closer to the clinic (which is 150 miles away). > So, they’re not horrible, and I think we do things kind of fairly for > the most part. But they will dump things on me if they can, and right > now, I’m just not well enough — not really well enough to do my full > part, much less what they dump on me in addition. > And today the drug store hosed me down! I mean, I can only go to the > drugstore when I’ve got someone to watch dad, right? SO I got there > today to pick up the prescriptions I called in the day before — 24 > hours before, and they don’t have mine ready. They had dad’s — but I > really didn’t need his until next week anyway. They say that they > called my doctor for refill authorization and she hadn’t returned > their call yesterday or so far this morning — but they couldn’t be > bothered to let me know there was a problem. I emailed my doc, and she > says that they didn’t call her until this morning, and I’m tending to > believe her. I had told them I wouldn’t pick them up until today, so I > bet they didn’t call. I was pissed. I would have been even more pissed > if they had messed up the script since I am almost out of prednisone > — I don’t even have my full dose for tomorrow until I pick it up. I > am going to try and leave dad alone long enough to do that since the > drug store is pretty close and it shouldn’t take me more than 20 > minutes, but still they wasted my time and energy when my time and > energy is so fragile right now. See, if my brother weren’t at the > beach, it wouldn’t have mattered and I wouldn’t have to take the > chance about leaving dad alone. But I’ve left him alone for long > enought to get drive-through, so it shouldn’t be a problem. I just > don’t like to do it, and I certainly don’t want to make a habit of it! > Anyway, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Look, I hope to give > you all some better news real soon about a project that I’m trying to > get started. So, until then, I hope to hang in here. > Y’all do the same — my thoughts are with you all. I may not have the > opportunity to write, but I do read some of the messages, and I try to > keep up with who isn’t doing well so I can remember them in my > prayers. Sorry I’m not more of a support right now, but I do try to do > that much anyway! > love, > steve (H) > CD Class of ‘82 > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers
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Response:
I just wanted to say thanks to everyone. I appreciate your response, your support and well-wishes. I get so pissed off sometimes, and I need to blow off that steam and rant and rave. I know it doesn’t do much good, but it makes me feel a little better. And not only that, it is kind of nice to know that my anger is pretty justified. When the steroids are kicking up, I can’t always tell if I’m being reasonable or not! But I thought I ought to also mention a few things. Yes, I do have help. I have a super lady who comes in 4 days a week for about 5 hours a day. During that time, she takes care of dad and does some housework as well. She has even helped me do a little cooking, though I generally like doing that myself. As to other help — well, insurance is not going to provide any help because they say my dad does not need "skilled nursing" care. In case you’re wondering, that means that he doesn’t need someone to adminsiter medicine or medical treatment. As to local agencies that can help on an income-based fee schedule, well, I would have to pay the agency more than I’m paying my super lady now, and she would end up getting less from the agency than I’m paying her if she worked for them. Not only that, but the agency would say that she couldn’t do any cleaning in the kitchen because me and my brother also live in the house. They would probably say she couldn’t do anything in the bathroom since my dad really can’t go to the bathroom anymore and so only me and my brothers use it now. I know all this because I used to have someone from the agency. So basically I would have to pay more to get less, and the person who did the actual work would get almost as much less as I would be paying extra! The sad thing is that I wish I could pay the lady more — she deserves it, but even at her current pay, we have more money going out each month than is coming in. Fortunately we have some extra because my brother had to buy the house from dad so that we could make sure it couldn’t be taken away from us if dad were to go to a nursing home. Actually, I think we’d be okay financially if me and my brother contributed more to the whole she-bang, but I’m not going to do that until he’s willing to match me, and that’s not going to happen until we’re flat broke. It’s not that he’s a miser, but ask him to take a little responsibility and he’ll tell you that he pays the cable bill already, thank you very much! But since he’s the one who has digital cable and a cable modem, then he should! And we actually have a pretty equitable system set up for most times. I do all the shopping and cooking, I watch dad after our lady leaves and I have him all day Friday to get up and bathe and whatnot; my brothers usually bring dad into the kitchen for supper and then put him in bed afterwards, they split the weekend days to get him up and watch him, my brother who lives here takes care of all the yardwork, the laundry and the vacuuming. I get to do dishes sometimes, but the brother who doesn’t live here does dishes when he and his new bride eat here and watch dad. The only problem I’ve really had in that situation is that the one brother will go out and do yard work on his day to take care of dad, expecting me to take him to the pot even though it’s his day. And the other brother has this annoying tendency to decide he has to go somewhere and leave dad to us on his day, but I’m really going to put my foot down on that one, because it’s just not fair to me or my other brother, though I’m usually the one who gets the worse of it. The other problem I’ve had is that since school has stopped for the summer, the weight training schedule that my brother has for the kids playing football has changed to later, so I am not having to get dad into the table and then into bed two nights a week in addition to everything else. On the few nights that I’ve tried to get dad to eat in his room or sit up until my brother gets home, he’s been a sorry bastard about it! Oh, he was actually good for me over the weekend, but that’s almost as bad since unless I get something he can pick up to eat, I have to feed him if he doesn’t come to the table. We make sure that he has biscuits and sandwiches for breakfast and lunch. So, we really don’t have a bad arrangement, except that right now I’m sick and I’m getting no acknowledgement that I can’t do all the things I usually do — in fact, things have actually gotten worse in that regard. But then to pull this latest stunt — to leave me alone with dad on the two days of the week that I have been spending in bed trying to recuperate, when they both know I’m having trouble eating solid food … it just doesn’t make any sense to me. I wouldn’t do that to anyone! I mean, I want you to get this — Tuesday evening is Robbie’s night to watch dad. Well, he put dad to bed and then went home to pack for the beach, he didn’t stay and give dad his medicine or anything else he might need before he went to sleep. Well, I had already decided that I was going to see Scoobie Doo that night since he was supposed to be here and my other brother would be there too. When I found out just before I left to make the picture, I actually felt guilty about leaving the one brother there alone with dad for the two hours. I mean, I don’t like to go anywhere when there’s only one of them there because I like to make sure they have back-up. Not that they’d think twice about that with me. I mean, in all fairness, I plan to take at least a week and go off and enjoy myself, too. But they’ll have the two of them to manage for that week, as well as the lady coming in. I just don’t understand. And I can’t help but think that I’m not ever going to get any better because every time I start to feel better, I have to go do stuff and wear myself out and put myself back in bed. One step forward and one step back! I have to wonder if how much better I would be doing if they would just give my body the chance to get some rest and heal. And, of course, if I could get my Remicade, most of this would be a moot point. I mean, if I were in remission, then I might still be irritated at them about a few things, but I could handle it. Of course, then they’d probably bitch about me having to run off to get my treatments once a month! I arrange them for Friday, so I leave Thurdsay evening and come back Sunday after spending the weekend with friends who live much closer to the clinic (which is 150 miles away). So, they’re not horrible, and I think we do things kind of fairly for the most part. But they will dump things on me if they can, and right now, I’m just not well enough — not really well enough to do my full part, much less what they dump on me in addition. And today the drug store hosed me down! I mean, I can only go to the drugstore when I’ve got someone to watch dad, right? SO I got there today to pick up the prescriptions I called in the day before — 24 hours before, and they don’t have mine ready. They had dad’s — but I really didn’t need his until next week anyway. They say that they called my doctor for refill authorization and she hadn’t returned their call yesterday or so far this morning — but they couldn’t be bothered to let me know there was a problem. I emailed my doc, and she says that they didn’t call her until this morning, and I’m tending to believe her. I had told them I wouldn’t pick them up until today, so I bet they didn’t call. I was pissed. I would have been even more pissed if they had messed up the script since I am almost out of prednisone — I don’t even have my full dose for tomorrow until I pick it up. I am going to try and leave dad alone long enough to do that since the drug store is pretty close and it shouldn’t take me more than 20 minutes, but still they wasted my time and energy when my time and energy is so fragile right now. See, if my brother weren’t at the beach, it wouldn’t have mattered and I wouldn’t have to take the chance about leaving dad alone. But I’ve left him alone for long enought to get drive-through, so it shouldn’t be a problem. I just don’t like to do it, and I certainly don’t want to make a habit of it! Anyway, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Look, I hope to give you all some better news real soon about a project that I’m trying to get started. So, until then, I hope to hang in here. Y’all do the same — my thoughts are with you all. I may not have the opportunity to write, but I do read some of the messages, and I try to keep up with who isn’t doing well so I can remember them in my prayers. Sorry I’m not more of a support right now, but I do try to do that much anyway! love, steve (H) CD Class of ‘82 ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers =—–
Response:
I don’t often think about such things until I need them myself, you know? I mean, ten or so years ago a young man that I had worked with in Scouting died. Well, he had MD, so we all knew it was a matter of time, but he was one of us, and he became such a part of us. I think I was in college at the time, or just out and still living in Charlottesville, but no one told me. My parents certainly knew and my brother had also worked with him in Scouts and he knew, so I was robbed of the chance to attend his funeral. They did save me the paper with the notice and all, but …. So, anyway, I decide that I want to go to the grave to at least say a farewell, but, that’s not possible either. It seems there isn’t one. Now, I actually like the idea of cremation, and am thinking that’s how I want my remains handled, but I am concerned that everyone who wants to has a chance to say goodbye. I don’t think they’ll be lining up at the doors or anything, but I know that it means a lot to me emotionally. I ended up writing a nice song that was kind of a tribute to Bruce, or at least I think that my mind was really on him when I wrote it, and that brought me a bit of peace back, but it would have been nice to say goodbye. I mean, this is a kid whose pecker I had to hold so he could pee! I bunked with him, I pushed his wheelchair, I have at one point or another done as much for him as you can do for someone. And, of course, I loved him dearly. He was such a special person, and knowing him really helped me come to terms with my own disability. Even if mine isn’t as severe or as fatal, he helped me realize that I really was handicapped just like him! So, I’m sorry for what you went through. It’s not good to be left without closure, but I’m wondering if there’s something you couldn’t do for yourself just to remember him. Kind of the same way that I ended up writing a song — some kind of memorial that you could have in your own home or something. I don’t know, maybe that’s more than you want to do, but just something as a way of saying goodbye and remembering. As for me, well, maybe they’ll figure out how sick I really am when I drop dead, but it won’t do me much good then! I don’t want them to wait on me hand and foot, I don’t want them to cater to me and do everything — I’d just like them to acknowledge that I can’t do as much as I normally do when I’m sick and to give me a little hand. That’s really all it would take. If they could give that little bit, I might have a chance to get some better, or at least, hold my own until I can get back on Remicade. But anyway, thanks for thinking of me! love, steve (H) CD Class of ‘82 ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Steve, I went down to Melbourne for a holiday with Nell (my wife) a few >months ago and while seeing the sights we thought we’d pay homage to our >good friend’s memory at a cemetery. >Later, back at home I said we went to the cemetery to see "Danny" and I >wished I’d remembered to see my Grandfather who was also ‘buried’ there. >My Mum who was going down to Melbourne thought she would go and see Harry >(her Dad) while she was in Melbourne. >My Mum spoke to her sister (who was the executor of the will) and my Aunty >said there was nothing to see! She didn’t bother paying to have the ashes >recognized! My grandfather wasn’t a happy man I remember, but he fought in >the WW1, was gassed, hospalised, no wonder he didn’t have a happy >disposition, but he deserved RECOGNITION. Even a pauper is recognised in a >pauper’s grave. >I know this doesn’t even go near what you are going through at the moment, >not even by half. But I know I never want to have anything to do with my >miserable Aunt again. >My little petty relative grievance isn’t anything near what you are going >through but you can only take so much. >John H(I) > Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright > nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the > human condition. > Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family > is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. > On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the > week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for > at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was > going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so > that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no > biggie. > On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the > beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. > So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the > whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until > after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, > it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate > solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or > pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s > when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all > week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. > I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a > shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to > depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the > thought of a shark lunching on them. > When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever > see me again. > such is life — well, my life, anyway > steve (H) > CD Class of ‘82 > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers >=—–
http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers =—–
Response:
Susan No the only pic you sent me was one of you and your son, and one of you in your new car Peace and Love Maryjo
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Thats not a bad idea Rebecca. We could possibly do something like that. I think Faulkner Memorial Gardens wouldn’t have any problem with it. I’m hoping that there may even be some documentation. It was in 1966 and Mum could get in touch with them in person. They properly would want some id. Thanks,
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Wow John, what an uncaring aunt. Is there anything you and your mum can do > at this point? Perhaps a memorial marker? > Rebecca 
> Steve, I went down to Melbourne for a holiday with Nell (my wife) a few > months ago and while seeing the sights we thought we’d pay homage to our > good friend’s memory at a cemetery. > Later, back at home I said we went to the cemetery to see "Danny" and I > wished I’d remembered to see my Grandfather who was also ‘buried’ there. > My Mum who was going down to Melbourne thought she would go and see Harry > (her Dad) while she was in Melbourne. > My Mum spoke to her sister (who was the executor of the will) and my Aunty > said there was nothing to see! She didn’t bother paying to have the ashes > recognized! My grandfather wasn’t a happy man I remember, but he fought in > the WW1, was gassed, hospalised, no wonder he didn’t have a happy > disposition, but he deserved RECOGNITION. Even a pauper is recognised in a > pauper’s grave. > I know this doesn’t even go near what you are going through at the moment, > not even by half. But I know I never want to have anything to do with my > miserable Aunt again. > My little petty relative grievance isn’t anything near what you are going > through but you can only take so much. > John H(I) > > Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright > > nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the > > human condition. > > Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family > > is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. > > On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the > > week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for > > at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was > > going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so > > that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no > > biggie. > > On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the > > beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. > > So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the > > whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until > > after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, > > it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate > > solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or > > pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s > > when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all > > week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. > > I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a > > shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to > > depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the > > thought of a shark lunching on them. > > When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever > > see me again. > > such is life — well, my life, anyway > > steve (H) > > CD Class of ‘82 > > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com > > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers > =—–
Response:
thanks susan … I am okay right now .. I decided they can dwell in hatred .. I am going to go on with my life and loving it Peace and Love Maryjo
Response:
Did I send you my pictures esp me, hubby and pirate with his bird? Turned out actually good for a person who seems to alsways look lousy in pics. UM MOM Susan
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> thanks susan … I am okay right now .. I decided they can dwell in hatred .. I > am going to go on with my life and loving it > Peace and Love > Maryjo
Response:
Wow John, what an uncaring aunt. Is there anything you and your mum can do at this point? Perhaps a memorial marker? Rebecca
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Steve, I went down to Melbourne for a holiday with Nell (my wife) a few > months ago and while seeing the sights we thought we’d pay homage to our > good friend’s memory at a cemetery. > Later, back at home I said we went to the cemetery to see "Danny" and I > wished I’d remembered to see my Grandfather who was also ‘buried’ there. > My Mum who was going down to Melbourne thought she would go and see Harry > (her Dad) while she was in Melbourne. > My Mum spoke to her sister (who was the executor of the will) and my Aunty > said there was nothing to see! She didn’t bother paying to have the ashes > recognized! My grandfather wasn’t a happy man I remember, but he fought in > the WW1, was gassed, hospalised, no wonder he didn’t have a happy > disposition, but he deserved RECOGNITION. Even a pauper is recognised in a > pauper’s grave. > I know this doesn’t even go near what you are going through at the moment, > not even by half. But I know I never want to have anything to do with my > miserable Aunt again. > My little petty relative grievance isn’t anything near what you are going > through but you can only take so much. > John H(I) > Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright > nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the > human condition. > Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family > is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. > On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the > week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for > at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was > going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so > that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no > biggie. > On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the > beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. > So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the > whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until > after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, > it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate > solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or > pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s > when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all > week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. > I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a > shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to > depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the > thought of a shark lunching on them. > When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever > see me again. > such is life — well, my life, anyway > steve (H) > CD Class of ‘82 > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers > =—–
Response:
Maryjo, you should know by now you can email or IM me anytime. UM MOM Susan
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Thanks … I feel better now that I was able to rant about it … My poor > husband has had so many earfuls … and he still turns around, and gives me a with my > X …but won’t !! > Peace and Love > Maryjo
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Thanks … I feel better now that I was able to rant about it … My poor husband has had so many earfuls … and he still turns around, and gives me a X …but won’t !! Peace and Love Maryjo
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Steve, I went down to Melbourne for a holiday with Nell (my wife) a few months ago and while seeing the sights we thought we’d pay homage to our good friend’s memory at a cemetery. Later, back at home I said we went to the cemetery to see "Danny" and I wished I’d remembered to see my Grandfather who was also ‘buried’ there. My Mum who was going down to Melbourne thought she would go and see Harry (her Dad) while she was in Melbourne. My Mum spoke to her sister (who was the executor of the will) and my Aunty said there was nothing to see! She didn’t bother paying to have the ashes recognized! My grandfather wasn’t a happy man I remember, but he fought in the WW1, was gassed, hospalised, no wonder he didn’t have a happy disposition, but he deserved RECOGNITION. Even a pauper is recognised in a pauper’s grave. I know this doesn’t even go near what you are going through at the moment, not even by half. But I know I never want to have anything to do with my miserable Aunt again. My little petty relative grievance isn’t anything near what you are going through but you can only take so much. John H(I) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright > nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the > human condition. > Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family > is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. > On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the > week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for > at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was > going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so > that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no > biggie. > On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the > beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. > So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the > whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until > after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, > it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate > solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or > pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s > when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all > week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. > I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a > shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to > depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the > thought of a shark lunching on them. > When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever > see me again. > such is life — well, my life, anyway > steve (H) > CD Class of ‘82 > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers
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Response:
Aw Maryjo, you have plenty of reasons to rant, so rant Hugs, Linda
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> (((((((((((((steve)))))))))))))))))) mine is and I > have not seen him in over a yr even though I am SUPPOSED to have shared > custody, and not from my lack of trying … Not even a phone call to my mom > when she was in the hospital for 3 weeks with double pnuemonia .. and a > ok, I am done ranting > Peace and Love > Maryjo
Response:
Maryjo- Rant away. I want to say that you are a very wonderful supporter of everyone here. Now it’s our turn to support you once in a while! You have handled yourself with dignity… for that you can be proud. Be well- Tracy CD class of ‘98 my homepage: http://home.talkcity.com/ParadiseDr/goodboie/index.html : ) smile – it makes people wonder what you’re up to!
Response:
(((((((((((((steve)))))))))))))))))) have not seen him in over a yr even though I am SUPPOSED to have shared custody, and not from my lack of trying … Not even a phone call to my mom when she was in the hospital for 3 weeks with double pnuemonia .. and a ok, I am done ranting Peace and Love Maryjo
Response:
Can you still get someone to come in and help you? As for your brothers, you know they do this crap to you all the time. Enough is enough. When they get back you tell them, not ask, but tell them they are responsible for your father on this day. If they give you any lip, you stay strong and tell them they are and that they had better do it right or the will feel your wrath. Don’t take it anymore. It is not fair and I know what I am talking about because my mom had to be the sole care taker of my grandma when I was little until my dad and I told her to be adamant with her sisters. They finally helped take her in and knew if they didn’t give her the proper care there would be hell to pay. Sorry you too feel horrible. UM MOM Susan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – 
>UM MOM Susan > Ah, but you see, to say "no," I’d actually have to KNOW that they are > planning to dump everything on me. I’ve given it a lot of thought, and > I’ve decided that once dad is gone, so am I. I’m not sure where I’ll > go, but it’ll be far away from here, and they won’t have to worry > about me asking them for anything ever again. And as far as I can > figure, that’s the only thing they worry about with me anyway. > I’ve had it. Today has been absolutely horrible. I managed to wake up > about 10:30 and I took dad something to drink. But I just didn’t have > the energy to do much else. I made myself a cappucino and tried to > pull things together. I finally got up enough strength to make dad > some breakfast and fed him in bed. And then I went to rest a while > before I began the monumental task of getting him out of bed and > washed off from all the pee and dressed and the bed stripped and the > laundry thrown in the machine, and now I’m out of it again. > The only thing I can really do is feel like crap. > As to my brother, I no longer care whether they have any clue about > Crohn’s Disease. I no longer care about them period. I was a fucking > moron for doing so in the first place. I mean, I have to give the one > brother this — at least he doesn’t pretend that it matters much to > him whether I live or die, so I always know where I stand there. > On the one hand, I don’t want anything to happen to dad. On the other, > I can’t help but want to get so far away from this that I can’t stand > it. I mean, I can kind of understand that dad is less concerned about > my health since he has his own health issues. But can you imagine how > it makes me feel to know that since Mom died, I really don’t have any > family anymore? > And once dad goes, that’s it. But if that’s how they want it, then > that’s fine by me. BUT they can forget about me trying to pretend I > care anymore. And they damn well better not insult me by pretending > they give a shit. > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers
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Response:
Aw geez Steve, they’re *still* at it 
How much more do they plan on using you? (I’m ticked). This is just totally unfair!! I’m sorry you’re left holding the bag – again. Hugs, Linda – who wishes she lived next door to Steve to give him lots of help ….. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright > nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the > human condition. > Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family > is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. > On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the > week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for > at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was > going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so > that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no > biggie. > On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the > beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. > So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the > whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until > after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, > it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate > solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or > pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s > when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all > week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. > I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a > shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to > depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the > thought of a shark lunching on them. > When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever > see me again. > such is life — well, my life, anyway > steve (H) > CD Class of ‘82 > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers
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>UM MOM Susan
Ah, but you see, to say "no," I’d actually have to KNOW that they are planning to dump everything on me. I’ve given it a lot of thought, and I’ve decided that once dad is gone, so am I. I’m not sure where I’ll go, but it’ll be far away from here, and they won’t have to worry about me asking them for anything ever again. And as far as I can figure, that’s the only thing they worry about with me anyway. I’ve had it. Today has been absolutely horrible. I managed to wake up about 10:30 and I took dad something to drink. But I just didn’t have the energy to do much else. I made myself a cappucino and tried to pull things together. I finally got up enough strength to make dad some breakfast and fed him in bed. And then I went to rest a while before I began the monumental task of getting him out of bed and washed off from all the pee and dressed and the bed stripped and the laundry thrown in the machine, and now I’m out of it again. The only thing I can really do is feel like crap. As to my brother, I no longer care whether they have any clue about Crohn’s Disease. I no longer care about them period. I was a fucking moron for doing so in the first place. I mean, I have to give the one brother this — at least he doesn’t pretend that it matters much to him whether I live or die, so I always know where I stand there. On the one hand, I don’t want anything to happen to dad. On the other, I can’t help but want to get so far away from this that I can’t stand it. I mean, I can kind of understand that dad is less concerned about my health since he has his own health issues. But can you imagine how it makes me feel to know that since Mom died, I really don’t have any family anymore? And once dad goes, that’s it. But if that’s how they want it, then that’s fine by me. BUT they can forget about me trying to pretend I care anymore. And they damn well better not insult me by pretending they give a shit. http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers =—–
Response:
UM MOM Susan
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Steve- > Funny how things go, isn’t it? People tend to rely on you because they know > that they can rely on you…sick and all. I’m sorry that you won’t have time > to de-stress. Everyone needs that time. Moreso when you are not healthy. > Seems that your brothers need a good talking to. Sounds like they listen, but > don’t really understand. > I hope you enjoy your upcoming vacation. > Be well- > Tracy > CD class of ‘98 > my homepage: > http://home.talkcity.com/ParadiseDr/goodboie/index.html > : ) smile – it makes people wonder what you’re up to!
Response:
Steve- Funny how things go, isn’t it? People tend to rely on you because they know that they can rely on you…sick and all. I’m sorry that you won’t have time to de-stress. Everyone needs that time. Moreso when you are not healthy. Seems that your brothers need a good talking to. Sounds like they listen, but don’t really understand. I hope you enjoy your upcoming vacation. Be well- Tracy CD class of ‘98 my homepage: http://home.talkcity.com/ParadiseDr/goodboie/index.html : ) smile – it makes people wonder what you’re up to!
Response:
Steven like we tell others, print out what we all go through with IBD. Also, get them ccfa fliers to boot. If you would like, I would be more than happy to email you anything you want since you know your family and know what might get their attentions to help you and your dad. It can’t hurt to do it, The worse senerio is they ignore it. I bet others will do the same. If I can help in any way email me at any time. What they are doing to you is insensitive and unfair and I am being nice. UM MOM Susan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright > nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the > human condition. > Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family > is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. > On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the > week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for > at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was > going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so > that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no > biggie. > On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the > beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. > So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the > whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until > after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, > it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate > solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or > pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s > when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all > week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. > I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a > shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to > depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the > thought of a shark lunching on them. > When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever > see me again. > such is life — well, my life, anyway > steve (H) > CD Class of ‘82 > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers
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Response:
And I hope you tell them about 5 minutes before you leave that you’re going!!! Sorry to hear that you still aren’t doing well. {{{{{ Steve }}}}} ~~~~Pat CD Class of 98 – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->"Steven D. Hylton" wrote > Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright > nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the > human condition. > Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family > is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. > On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the > week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for > at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was > going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so > that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no > biggie. > On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the > beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. > So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the > whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until > after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, > it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate > solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or > pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s > when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all > week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. > I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a > shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to > depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the > thought of a shark lunching on them. > When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever > see me again. > such is life — well, my life, anyway > steve (H) > CD Class of ‘82 > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com
Response:
Sorry to hear that after all this time your family doesn;t give you the respect that you deserve Steve. I hope you make it through OK. Debs – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright > nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the > human condition. > Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family > is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. > On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the > week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for > at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was > going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so > that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no > biggie. > On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the > beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. > So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the > whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until > after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, > it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate > solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or > pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s > when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all > week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. > I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a > shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to > depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the > thought of a shark lunching on them. > When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever > see me again. > such is life — well, my life, anyway > steve (H) > CD Class of ‘82 > ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! > —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers =—–
Response:
Reality tilts, yet we humans insist on going through it upright nonetheless. I think that says all that needs to be said about the human condition. Just two weeks ago, my aunt reassured me that everyone in the family is aware of my health situation and understands. Yeah, right. On Tuesday, I found out that my brother was going to the beach for the week this week. No biggie, I expected that he would go down there for at least a little while while everyone else was down there. And he was going to leave to spend the night with my aunt & uncle Friday night so that they could get up early and leave Saturday morning. Again, no biggie. On Thursday, I found out that my other brother had already gone to the beach and wasn’t planning on coming back until Monday. So, basically, my brothers planned on leaving me alone with Dad the whole damn weekend, and didn’t even have the balls to tell me until after it was too late for me to possibly find some help. Of course, it’s not like I’m sick or anything … I mean, I can almost tolerate solid food again! Provided that the solid food is chicken, bread or pasta. And it’s not like I do much on the weekends … except that’s when I try to recover from all the stress and stuff I’ve had to do all week. So I don’t actually tend to spend much time out of bed. I have never really hated people much … until now. You know, if a shark ate them, at least I wouldn’t think that I might be able to depend on them. And there’s something incredibly satisfying about the thought of a shark lunching on them. When I go away for my vacation later this summer, they might not ever see me again. such is life — well, my life, anyway steve (H) CD Class of ‘82 ASCC on the WWW: http://ascc.healingwell.com http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–= Over 100,000 Newsgroups – Unlimited Fast Downloads – 19 Servers =—–
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