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Question:

>> After a while she told me that she was closing her ears. >Yep…. far more like it! > Hey are you the same bob whelan they mentioned in the flame psychiatry?? I > hope not! > Take care..

I dont know..  are they gossiping?? Ill check it out..

Response:

>>I think you have way too many

koi tanks in WA!!! Is it a conspiracy? Or >are the koi involved in all those

coffee places? Just what IS the >connection? If everywhere I went there were

koi, I’d be getting a bit >paranoid. I’m !/2 serious >No Koi are good, evil

places like group health and mercedes benz need koi, they >just don’t know why

AH HA!!!! A big old light bulb just went off over my head! I get what you mean, wink wink (seriously) >Koi are my friends, I was mistaken.  Also it is not >possible for a hen to be evil.  I’m so glad that I talked to a mystic about >this instead of just talking to the evil HMO borgs who only pass out meds and >don’t talk. >I’m going to go talk to my 3  buddies in the fish tank in

about half an hour. Much more enlightening then my pdoc I’m sure. I spent 20 minutes explaining to him tues why I quit taking neurontin (for my fibro pain which it helped wonderfully btw) because it made me dizzy enough I couldn’t walk, let alone drive and puking from the vertigo. So he sez "Well maybe we should take you off the depakote completely and increase the neurontin?" Now when I first asked him to try neurontin a few years back he had a fit which since he’s Pakstani was quite colorful. NOW he wants to switch me??? Am I boring I’m ready for some koi therapy but first I’m applying for SSI as I hear koi don’t write very well and may have problems filling out the forms. >Boy did I freak out the senior citizen

volunteer at the concession stand next >to the koi tank that last time I went

there.  The koi had been moved down >stairs so they could replace the carpet

upstairs.  I suggested to the volunteer >that it might not be safe for her to be

there at the evil HMO without the >protection of the koi near by…. >After

a while she told me that she was closing her ears. "Closing her ears?" That would be a neat trick…what are they, like the nictating membrane in catseye’s? I may be getting a little out there but animals don’t lie to us and I trust them. They don’t "trick" us…a snake is a snake & you always know a rattler will bite you if he can. But if you respect him it’s cool. But human behavior??? caroly~vonne

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I think you have way too many koi tanks in WA!!! Is it a conspiracy? Or >are the koi involved in all those coffee places? Just what IS the >connection? If everywhere I went there were koi, I’d be getting a bit >paranoid. I’m !/2 serious > No Koi are good, evil places like group health and mercedes benz need koi, they > just don’t know why  ;)  Koi are my friends, I was mistaken.  Also it is not > possible for a hen to be evil.  I’m so glad that I talked to a mystic about > this instead of just talking to the evil HMO borgs who only pass out meds and > don’t talk. > I’m going to go talk to my 3  buddies in the fish tank in about half an hour. > Boy did I freak out the senior citizen volunteer at the concession stand next > to the koi tank that last time I went there.  The koi had been moved down > stairs so they could replace the carpet upstairs.  I suggested to the volunteer > that it might not be safe for her to be there at the evil HMO without the > protection of the koi near by…. > After a while she told me that she was closing her ears.

Yep…. far more like it!

Response:

>>In article

says… >>>I think you have way too many >koi tanks in

WA!!! Is it a conspiracy? Or >>>are the koi involved in all those >coffee

places? Just what IS the >>>connection? If everywhere I went there were >koi,

I’d be getting a bit >>>paranoid. I’m !/2 serious >>No Koi are good, evil >places like group health and mercedes benz need koi, they >>just don’t know why >;) >AH HA!!!! A big old light bulb just went off over my

head! I get what you >mean, wink wink (seriously) >Huh?  I just mean that

koi are so good and pure that they help off set the evil >in places like HMO’s

and Mercedes Benz Dealerships. Yes that’s the way I understood you. And I’m not making fun of you or teasing you. I hadn’t thought about it before but as soon as you said they were good, it was like so obvious why they were there. Not to deceive but to remind us and bring a balance to the situation. >Much more

enlightening then my pdoc I’m sure. I spent 20 >minutes explaining to him tues

why I quit taking neurontin (for my fibro pain >which it helped wonderfully

btw) because it made me dizzy enough I couldn’t >walk, let alone drive and

puking from the vertigo. So he sez "Well maybe we >should take you off the

depakote completely and increase the neurontin?" Now >when I first asked him to

try neurontin a few years back he had a fit which >since he’s Pakstani was

quite colorful. NOW he wants to switch me??? Am I boring >him??? Am I TOO

>Strange very strange… but it might be fun to

get him worked up just for the >entertainment.

It HAS crossed my mind. But I’m such a "good girl." You know, if my meds weren’t working as well as they do and I wasn’t afraid of stopping them and then restarting them only to have them NOT work, I would give him something to really work with. Maybe I should since I want to reapply for SSI. The first time I was turned down because he told them I was improving. Well yeah I was but I will never be 100% or even 75%….closer to 50% competent now. >I’m ready for some koi therapy but >first I’m applying

for SSI as I hear koi don’t write very well and may have >problems filling out the forms. >Koi are very relaxing to be around once you realize that they are good spirits >here to protect you from evil.

Agreed ) >But no they can’t

fill out SSDI forms trapped >inside those little tanks.  

LOL. Also, how would they hold a pen or use a word processor w/o hands? Spose they could dictate things tho. Perhaps to a starfish or octopus? >I’m tempted to leave my HMO so

I can go free the KOI and not have to worry >about getting kicked out of my

HMO. I think you should leave the koi there so they can do their job. Frankly Shawnie, you are sounding better, more coherent, logical and HAPPIER now then ever. So maybe whatever combination of therapies you are using right now is the best. You sound like you’re really in touch and working with and for what’s best for YOU! I’m enjoying your sense of humor immensely and I really hope this mood level can be sustained for a good long time. I know you’re worried about the inevitable cycle coming but savor every moment you have now girl. >Their

closing the urgent care is just about the last straw for me.  Now I have >to go

23 miles to get urgent care.  If I had any other health insurance in the >county

I would only have to go 8 miles to get urgent care.   >They also cut way back

on the pharmacy hours when they closed urgent care.  If >I had any other health

plan I could go to any pharmacy in the county and not be >stuck with the HMO

pharmacies limited hours. I went through the same thing with the pharmacy moving, not quite as far as yours but in a direction that I rarely go so it’s out of my way. AND I’m never sure they’ll have filled my scripts if I call them in since you don’t get to talk to a human. Damn..I’m not sure which is worse, receptionists or those damn phone menus where you push buttons and no human contact. >My therp was pretty disgusted when I told her that I had to go buy yet another >bottle of Seroquel because my doc is so lazy??

It is disgusting. Shawnie, are they doing this because they think of you as a "problem?" You know, like you bug/demand of them to give you the "care" they are spose to be providing? Can you get someone, like your ex or? to go advcate for you? It’s inexcusable. I get my meds free through the county medi-cal program. I know how lucky I am. >>After >a while she told me that she was closing her ears. >"Closing her ears?" That >would be a neat trick…what are they,

like the nictating membrane in catseye’s? >Who knows elders are tricky…

Maybe she would turn into a bat and fly away. LOL >I may be getting a

little out there but animals don’t lie to us and I trust >them. They don’t

"trick" us…a snake is a snake & you always know a rattler >will bite you if

he can. But if you respect him it’s cool. But human behavior??? >Even

rattle snake will run *slither* away if it can, it only bites when >cornered or

stepped on. Exactly…you know what to expect from them. It’s never going to stand up on new legs and offer to shake your hand with the intention of then biting that hand after professing friendship. I trust people who like/love the company of animals, and those people that animals trust. It’s not something someone can fake. Animals know if you are phoney or evil. caroly~vonne

Response:

>A couple of weeks ago my now 4 year old

cracked me up.  It was about 8 at night >and she said.  "mommy lets to go Reno

right now"  LOL!  She seems to think it’s >a two hour drive.

Ah HA!!! Like mother, like daughter. Better watch her. I’ll bet she can be a great travel companion with that attitude! Man…a road trip is sounding better & better. And the cooler the air the better. Take a sleeping bag & stop whenever.I HATE socal. In fact I hate most of it except the coast from San Luis Obispo north and my beloved sierras. Unfortunately this latitude and climate are better for my depressions, but I LOOOVE to travel. Reno is only about an 7 hour drive from here & I have family on the way. Only I’d rather meet up in Tahoe because of the heat. Or Grand Junction, CO is about a 12 hour drive…all of it through the desert. Oh well…. caroly~vonne

Response:

>>On

God ordained it. —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 80,000 Newsgroups – 16 Different Servers! =—–

Response:

>>>on a manic road trip, let me know. Depending on your route, I could probably >>meet up w/ you somewhere along the way. I have the feelng we have an awful lot >>more in common then I thought! >>caroly~vonne >Can I come, I’ll skip my Zyprexa? >We can rob a drug store… won’t the druggist be scratching his head when we >pass him a note that says "give me all your zyprexa, seroquel, lamictal, >depakote and Topomax"  instead of the usual give me all your ritalin.

You know the sad thing about that is I _actually_ thought about it before. "Give me the Zyprexa and no one gets hurt!" —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 80,000 Newsgroups – 16 Different Servers! =—–

Response:

I think you have way too many koi tanks in WA!!! Is it a conspiracy? Or are the koi involved in all those coffee places? Just what IS the connection? If everywhere I went there were koi, I’d be getting a bit paranoid. I’m !/2 serious

Response:

>Hope

you guys had a good time. >I’m from Ohio and went to Texas last week to visit Robert.  More than >a couple times I got into his Jeep and the temperature read 120. >btw… they DO have humidity!  Ouch.  Driving with the windows down >did

not cool the temperature at all.  It was just all hot air.  Kinda >took me aback

when I talked to Robert after I got home and he said, >"Its supposed to be hot this week."  lol >Linda

>100 degrees is hot for us Seattle

types…  to give you an idea we all thought >we were roasting on the 4th of

July this year when the mercury hit 80…. >I know I’d just die in

Oklahoma or So Cal.  Hell I almost died in Sacramento >when I stopped to pick

up my lamictal before I headed up Donner pass.  It was >90 degrees there.  What

a shock it was when I decided to head back home via the >Oregon coast.  I went

from 90 degrees to 60 degrees in one day. psssst…Linda…come along! caroly~vonne

Response:

I’m there! L – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->Hope >you guys had a good time. >I’m from Ohio and went to Texas last week to visit >Robert.  More than >a couple times I got into his Jeep and the temperature read >120. >btw… they DO have humidity!  Ouch.  Driving with the windows down >did >not cool the temperature at all.  It was just all hot air.  Kinda >took me aback >when I talked to Robert after I got home and he said, >"Its supposed to be hot >this week."  lol >Linda >>100 degrees is hot for us Seattle >types…  to give you an idea we all thought >>we were roasting on the 4th of >July this year when the mercury hit 80…. >>I know I’d just die in >Oklahoma or So Cal.  Hell I almost died in Sacramento >>when I stopped to pick >up my lamictal before I headed up Donner pass.  It was >>90 degrees there.  What >a shock it was when I decided to head back home via the >>Oregon coast.  I went >from 90 degrees to 60 degrees in one day. >psssst…Linda…come along! >caroly~vonne

Response:

>I hear you… I just ran out of Seroquel and can not get it refilled because I >found out the hard way that my HMO pharmacy now closes three hours earlier. >Shit, I might have enough of it to make me fall asleep tonight but I’ll be >talking to the koi at my HMO in the morning for sure.

I was two hours late on my dose of Zyprexa last night and I started getting manicy, tomorrow I have an appointment with a new pdoc, state run…..oh joy. >I’m tempted to quit taking it until my pdoc and his nurses get off their asses >at get me on the program.  The latest hold up was he wanted me to fill in my >address because???????  Hell if I know.  They know my address well enough to >send me a bill every month.

Might be one of those dumb ass patient confidentiality things. >In a few days I could be in the hospital (I have 100% hospitalization coverage) >and getting free seroquel.  Then I could tell them I ran out while waiting (4 >months now) to get on the assistance program and could not afford more.

Well it’s good to know that you can go if things get rough. >Tempting… but no, I’ll go in there tomorrow morning and hand my HMO $135.00 >for yet another bottle of Seroquel that should have been free.  I’ll will have >missed 1/3 of tonight’s dose and all of tomorrow morning’s dose by the time I >get there in the morning and they do have a koi tank… LOL!

I’ll be thinking of you, hope it’s not to bad. Get it asap (sometimes I state the obvious lol, but I like to see my typing) —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 80,000 Newsgroups – 16 Different Servers! =—–

Response:

Hope you guys had a good time. I’m from Ohio and went to Texas last week to visit Robert.  More than a couple times I got into his Jeep and the temperature read 120. btw… they DO have humidity!  Ouch.  Driving with the windows down did not cool the temperature at all.  It was just all hot air.  Kinda took me aback when I talked to Robert after I got home and he said, "Its supposed to be hot this week."  lol Linda – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->100 degrees is hot for us Seattle types…  to give you an idea we all thought >we were roasting on the 4th of July this year when the mercury hit 80…. >I know I’d just die in Oklahoma or So Cal.  Hell I almost died in Sacramento >when I stopped to pick up my lamictal before I headed up Donner pass.  It was >90 degrees there.  What a shock it was when I decided to head back home via the >Oregon coast.  I went from 90 degrees to 60 degrees in one day.

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> L.A. for swimming pools and car washes. Lately, in >the past decade & a half, with some court rulings, they (LA) haven’t been able >to dry up all the water sources in the Sierras by late summer like they used to. >But before that and as recently as the late 1970’s people would blow up the >aqueduct occasionally. There was a regular vigilante war going on earlier. The >movies Chinatown and The Two Makes (Jack Nichols on) relate to the water wars of >those times. Mr. Multiplicand was a genius (he built many

improvements in LA which >includes the San Sertindole Valley which is where I

grew up) but he & his cronies >We have a very sad thing happening over here.

Since our corrupt power company >sold our energy to California instead of saving

some they have decided not to >spill any water over the Snake and Columbia river damns this summer. >Wild salmons runs that are already threatened will be

devastated by this.  They >will have trouble migrating upstream to lay their

eggs because they will have >to try to some how get over the damn and up the

fish ladders. Yes it’s very sad about the lack of foresight. Man has to meddle rather then be a caretaker. I do understand your feelings about this. I grew up using the water we stole from the sierras and then lived at the other end for years. When the lakes in the area turn into mudholes and the trees are dying from lack of groundwater, you start to pay attention. The sad part is that here in San Bernardino, our groundwater level is so high it floods the basement at city hall. But it’s not used and the excuse? It’s contaminated from chemicals used at Norton AFB back in the 40’s and some other "dump" (military type) a few miles to the north of us has caused a "toxic plume" contaminating the groundwater also and that has spread to under our home. What a waste. So we plunder the Colorado River water and use up any resources elsewhere…just as long as we can’t see what it’s doing, no one seems to care! Crap! This is the kind of thing that depresses me so badly because I feel so helpless/powerless. I can barely manage my own life. caroly~vonne

Response:

>>>Tempting… but no, I’ll go in there tomorrow morning and hand my HMO $135.00 >>for yet another bottle of Seroquel that should have been free.  I’ll will have >>missed 1/3 of tonight’s dose and all of tomorrow morning’s dose by the time I >>get there in the morning and they do have a koi tank… LOL! >I’ll be thinking of you, hope it’s not to bad. Get it asap (sometimes >I state the obvious lol, but I like to see my typing) >I did well, better than I expected.. the only thing that happened as a result >of my drastically decreased dose was that I got really light headed when I held >a shop owners crystal.  Normally that probably would not have happened.  

You know I used to have the feeling that I would prevail against this disease, but since I had the bouts of mania, I am at such a loss. It’s awful to be frightened of your thoughts, Dad, my bro and people that know I was hospitalized treat me differently now. Only those in the know treat me well. —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 80,000 Newsgroups – 16 Different Servers! =—–

Response:

>>>on a manic road trip, let me know.

Depending on your route, I could probably >>meet up w/ you somewhere along the

way. I have the feelng we have an awful lot >>more in common then I thought! >>caroly~vonne >Can I come, I’ll skip my Zyprexa? >We can

rob a drug store… won’t the druggist be scratching his head when we >pass him

a note that says "give me all your zyprexa, seroquel, lamictal, >depakote and

Topomax"  instead of the usual give me all your ritalin. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO!!!!! Oh god what a picture I have in my mind. I say let’s do it! caroly~vonne

Response:

> My wife was diagnosed BI-polar with psychotic tendencies over ten years ago.

snipped… Here is a good link for loved ones of a person with BP Disorder: The link for the BPSO public pages is: www.angelfire.com/zine/manic. — LyndaNP Reality isn’t the way you wish things to be, nor the way they appear to be, but the way they actually are. – Robert J. Ringer

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > My wife was diagnosed BI-polar with psychotic tendencies over ten years ago. > Let me tell you we have been to HELL and back in that time.  She is resistant > to treatment (she thinks otherwise) and when she becomes ill, she will not > take her meds as prescribed by her med doc. > She is currently in a full-blown psychosis.  She believes that time is > accelerating, that the end of the world is coming in 2012, that John Kennedy > JR is the savior of the new world, and that she is in communication with my > deceased father.  She carries on a constant conversation with the voice in her > head. > I have taken to watching her take her meds, but she will only let me do this > for a few days at a time. > She believes that she was cured a year and a half ago and that since then she > has had no symptoms. > Can anyone give me a strategy to deal with her.  I try to reason with her, but > in her current state, I make no progress. I am at the end of my rope.

HI Richard, Sorry to hear of this sad affair; Does your wife feel better when she takes her meds?  Is she calmer and more coherent and clear-thinking then?  If so, and i know it takes a few months in the case of some drugs to start showing signs of working… then perhaps you can point out to her the difference, and impress upon her how much less she suffers (and you too)?  The trick is getting her to stay until the drugs take effect – one thing that always works, is offering to take her out or buy her things she likes, or just be very doting not sure if this helps at all; Squiggles

Response:

>She is currently in a

full-blown psychosis.  She believes that time is >accelerating, that the end

of the world is coming in 2012, that John Kennedy >JR is the savior of the new

world, and that she is in communication with my >deceased father.  She carries

on a constant conversation with the voice in her >head. >How do you know

that she is psychotic? you certainly DO have a wicked sense of humor there. I’m glad you are having a decent summer. Have lots of good times, especially w/ your daughter. And I agree with her…garter snakes are too cool. If you do go on a manic road trip, let me know. Depending on your route, I could probably meet up w/ you somewhere along the way. I have the feelng we have an awful lot more in common then I thought! caroly~vonne

Response:

>>How do you know >that she is psychotic? >you certainly DO have a wicked sense of humor there. >I’m glad you are having a decent summer. Have lots of good times, especially w/ >your daughter. And I agree with her…garter snakes are too cool. If you do go >on a manic road trip, let me know. Depending on your route, I could probably >meet up w/ you somewhere along the way. I have the feelng we have an awful lot >more in common then I thought! >caroly~vonne

Can I come, I’ll skip my Zyprexa? —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 80,000 Newsgroups – 16 Different Servers! =—–

Response:

>On

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->>How do you know >that she is psychotic? >you certainly DO have a wicked sense of humor there. >I’m glad you are having a decent summer. Have lots of good times, especially w/ >your daughter. And I agree with her…garter snakes are too cool. If you do go >on a manic road trip, let me know. Depending on your route, I could probably >meet up w/ you somewhere along the way. I have the feelng we have an awful lot >more in common then I thought! >caroly~vonne >Can I

come, I’ll skip my Zyprexa? >—–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– >http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >—–==  Over 80,000 Newsgroups – 16 Different Servers! =—–

(This needed to come out of that thread…) Hell yes! And you know only one of us needs to be manic in the beginning…the rest of us will soon be there if we’re altogether. I have to limit my time w/ my sister-in-law (also a manic depressive) or else we’re off & running. In fact I think people would pay good money to see a bunch of manicky people heading for who knows where, sort of a traveling sideshow…that is, pay good money to make sure we didn’t put down roots in any of their "pure" little towns. We’d be like the Pied Pipers of Madness…the siren call to all with mental disorders, gathering followers wherever we passed through. (Have you ever noticed how many, ahem, "odd" people you’ve attracted in your life? Sort of like carnies I suppose…"Oh yes, my daughter/son ran off with the manics." Better get a bus. And be sure to stop in Vegas so Gemini can tsk tsk and condemn us maniacs, the trolling troublemakers that we are. Oh yeah, like LV isn’t full of whack jobs who are considered "normal"…….NOT!!! Pot…kettle…black.) I’m afraid it would probably be a short trip though…I know from experience that from socal to Lincoln, Nebraska is only about a 20 hour trip when one is manic. And that’s with me having to stop and pee every hour. (Note to self: be sure and get one of those female urinals for next trip.) Or I can take road trips where 10 miles can take all day if I’m in one of those distracted moods where I HAVE to explore each roadside attraction or viewpoint or historical marker or sideroad, especially if it’s a dirt road…just gotta see what’s around the next bend or get out and examine the miniature flowers in the desert. Or I’ll decide I want to stop and wait for the sun to come up in a certain place…or the moon to rise. The Painted Desert is good for that! Or stop around Grand Mesa in Colorado & check out the fishing or sit and watch the Bald eagles. Or if I happen upon an airshow or fireworks, gotta stop awhile. You know, that kind of thing can make for a very looooong trip. You know, I love roadtrips and I reeeally, reeeally feel like I’m ready for one, but it’ll probably be to head north to the Eastern Sierra to see family & old friends. But you’re welcome to come and Linda of course! It’s a beautiful area of the country. The nearest cities are L.A & Reno and it’s about halfway between them. Look on a map…Bishop, Crowley and Mammoth Lakes, CA. Yosemite is on the other side of the mountain range from there but it’s a mighty long drive. Hiking to Yo-sa-mite (yes I’ve heard it pronounce that way) takes a few days but what country!!! On the way I mean. Yosemite is beautiful but is so crowded and smoggy they have to use trams, no cars allowed. It feels like an amusement park which is a shame. If you go over rt120 (closed in winter-snowed in)from the east side of the range and don’t go all the way into the village you still see some mighty fine high country though. Hiking across is still the best. The bears do it all the time. Death Valley and Mt Whitney (highest and lowest spots in the continental U.S.) are just to the south. The Bristlecone Pine Forest, the oldest living trees is just across the valley in the White Mountain Range. Mono Lake, a huge, ancient saline lake that only supports brine and fairy shrimp and FLIES, and the seagulls who feed on them is to the north at Lee Vining and the turnoff for Yosemite, near the ghost town of Bodie. This is the area Clint Eastwood used for High Plains Drifter. Many of my friends were extras in that movie as well as others. There are these weird rock/mineral formations called tufa towers that show up as the water recedes. The water rights to Mono Lake and all waterways to the south were bought up in the early part of the 20th century by Los Angeles and it’s all pumped down to L.A. for swimming pools and car washes. Lately, in the past decade & a half, with some court rulings, they (LA) haven’t been able to dry up all the water sources in the Sierras by late summer like they used to. But before that and as recently as the late 1970’s people would blow up the aqueduct occassionally. There was a regular vigilante war going on earlier. The movies Chinatown and The Two Jakes (Jack Nicholson) relate to the water wars of those times. Mr. Mulholland was a genius (he built many improvements in LA which includes the San Fernando Valley which is where I grew up) but he & his cronies were also crooks. Also the cold weather and high altitude training base camp at Pickell Meadows is up there where, if you’re lucky you can watch the Marines playing wars games around you when you camp in the back country or see Big Horn Sheep. They, the Marines not the sheep, dropped, abandoned and lost so much equipment like MREs, water and gas cans, I no longer wonder where the hell our tax dollars go. So careless. MREs aren’t bad tho..we ate the 2 cases they dumped or dropped. It was a fair trade…they pretended we were the enemy and would stalk us at night, watching our camp. Scared the bejeezus out of me one night. After the sun had set but the sky wasn’t quite black, when it’s that beautiful shade of blue that will silhouette(sp) trees and mountains I was fixing supper. I got this eerie feeling of being watched as I puttered around. A friend and I of had been wooding commercially and illegally all summer so I was a bit worried it might be a ranger (they are federal agents you know..big time trouble.) He would work til absolute dark while I cooked dinner. I really felt unnerved that night which isn’t too odd for me, but I finally scoped out 2 figures off by the little crick. My friend was just a few yards away but in the opposite direction. I finally demanded that whoever was there come out. I’m a bit afraid of the dark and this just down right gave me the willies, especially when 2 guys with rifles DID come out and over to the fire. A couple of kids in uniform is all they were. Drank a beer each, shared a joint, had a bit of gourmet army gravy (SOS) and were so happy for the company of civilians. We camped there for several days and invited them back but they never showed again. We happened to be in the middle of their final skirmish not long after that, complete with them shooting weapons and helicopters landing in the meadow just at the edge of the hill here where we we’re busy cutting and loading and being used for cover. I’m just glad I wasn’t psychotic at the time. What a trip. And speaking of "horny sheep", the Nevada border and nearest casino and whorehouse (legal)is only about a 40 minute drive north. "Monkey Pass" is a real dive (I love it) for a casino and "Janie’s Ranch" is just a collection of mobile homes with semi trucks always parked out front. I think there is a gas station and motel there also, or at least there was. Janie’s & the Lodge I’m sure are there. Gee this got long but I do love and miss my mountains. You’d probably recognize the area if you visited…so many movies have been filmed there from Bogart in "Treasure of the Sierra Madre" & John Wayne in countless cowboy movies around the Alabama Hills. "The Other Side Of the Mountain" about Jill Kinmont the skier who still lives in Bishop. One version of "Call of the Wild." God there are so many! And one of my favorites "Tremors" with Kevin Bacon, tons of truck and car commercials, as well as Charlie Sheen in that stupid movie about listening for signals from outer space on radio telescopes and his adventures w/ the aliens. Bad movie but great scenery, I could even see the ridge my sis-in-law lives on in the background. BTW, they do listen for outer space signals there on radio telescopes, huge football field sized dishes that run on tracks, scanning the skies at all times. We call them the "Big Ears" and if you ever get a chance to visit a place like that for an open house, GO! The final scene in that Charlie Sheen movie was filmed at Big Ears. It’s a fascinating place…they do the kind of stuff Jodie Foster did in "Contact." Oh yes another claim to fame…Charlie Manson and his "family" lived in the desert near there and MY very own lawyer, Frank Fowles was the D.A. at the time and arrested them putting together the beginnings of the case agaist them for the Tate/LaBianca murders. But there are so many more out of the way, peaceful and calm spots that it is always going to be where I consider home, NOT the armpit in socal where I’m at now. Soon, soon I hope to return for good. Honestly…talking about that place is sometimes all that keeps me sane. Sorry to have rambled on but maybe one of you might have enjoyed my little travelogue ) Guess I’m just a bit hypo so I’ll go out to the garden and put it to use! caroly~vonne

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My wife was diagnosed BI-polar with psychotic tendencies over ten years ago.   Let me tell you we have been to HELL and back in that time.  She is resistant to treatment (she thinks otherwise) and when she becomes ill, she will not take her meds as prescribed by her med doc. She is currently in a full-blown psychosis.  She believes that time is accelerating, that the end of the world is coming in 2012, that John Kennedy JR is the savior of the new world, and that she is in communication with my deceased father.  She carries on a constant conversation with the voice in her head. I have taken to watching her take her meds, but she will only let me do this for a few days at a time.   She believes that she was cured a year and a half ago and that since then she has had no symptoms. Can anyone give me a strategy to deal with her.  I try to reason with her, but in her current state, I make no progress. I am at the end of my rope.

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