Consumer Homes.

Question:

Did somebody write my autobiography for me while I was sleeping?

Response:

I didn’t get the original, but I could read the quotes (thanks to those who use quotes!).  It brought me to tears.  Thanks Lisa for sharing that! Take Care! Vicki Surratt Proud Mom of Kathy (6) and Jenny (9)! Visit my new website! http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Oaks/9003/ – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > I really enjoyed that!  Thanks for sharing > Debbie C >This is being forwarded from a list I’m on…thought some here might enjoy >it also… >Lisa >My husband came home today and saw me sitting >on the couch, toddler on one knee, and baby >nursing on the opposite breast.  I was trying to >turn the pages of a book with the hand not >attached to the infant, while listening for the >sound of the stove buzzer, which would indicate >that tonight’s pork chops were at the stage >between "well-done" and "the dog gets tonight’s >entree". >My husband looked at me innocently, and asked >"So, did you do anything today?" It’s a good >thing that most of my appendages were otherwise >engaged, >as I was unable to jump up and throttle him >to death. This was probably for the best, as I >assume that asking a stupid question is not >grounds for murder in this country. >Let me back up a bit, and explain what led me >to this point in my life. I was not always >bordering on the brink of insanity.  On the >contrary, a mere four years ago, I had a good >job, steady income, and a vehiclethat could NOT >seat a professional sports team, and me, >comfortably.  I >watched television shows that were not hosted > by singing puppets. I went to bed later than >nine o’clock at night. I preferred sex to >sleeping in.  I laughed at those people who drove >halfway across the country hauling a tent >trailer, three >screaming kids, a drooling dog, and called it a >holiday.  Now I have become one of them! >What happened?  The stick turned blue! >I have traded in my Victoria’s Secrets lingerie >for cotton briefs and a firm support nursing bra. >Good-bye, Garth Brooks.  Hello, Sharon, Lois and >Bram.  My idea of privacy is getting to  use the >bathroom without a two-year old banging on the >door, and the baby spinning the toilet paper roll >from my lap. And I finally understand that the >term "Stay-At-Home Mom" does not refer to a >parent who no longer works outside the house, but >rather to one who never seems to get out the >front door. >So here I sit, children in hand, wondering how to >answer my beloved husband. DID I DO ANYTHING >TODAY?  Well, I think I did, although not much >seems to have gotten accomplished. I shared >breakfast in bed with a handsome young man.  Of >course, the breakfast consisted of a bowl of >oatmeal and leftover cookie crumbs found between >the sheets.  The handsome young man is about >thirty-four inches tall and only gets really >excited at the sight of purple dinosaurs, toy >trucks and french fries. I got to take a relaxing >stroll in the woods. Of course, I was on the >lookout for frogs and lizards, and had to >stop and smell the dandelions along the way. I >successfully washed one load of laundry, moved >the load that was in the washer into the dryer, >and the dryer load into the basket.  The load >that was in the basket is now spread out on the >bed, awaiting my bedtime decision to actually put >the clothes away or merely move them to the top >of the dresser. >I read two or three classics.  Of course, Dickens >and Shakespeare cannot take credit for these >works, as we have moved on to the works of Seuss >and Munsch. I  don’t think I will be making any >trips to the Adult Section of my local library >anytime soon. >In between, I dusted, wiped, organized and >rearranged. I kissed away the owies and washed >away the tears.  I scolded, praised, hugged, and >tested my patience, all before noon. >DID I DO ANYTHING TODAY?  You betcha! I will now >understand what people mean when they say that >parenthood isthe hardest job they will ever have. > In my LBD (life before diapers) I was able to >teach young minds how to divide fractions and >write complex sentences, but I am unable to teach >a strong willed two-year-old how to use the >toilet. I was once able to navigate urban streets >while talking on the car phone and looking for a >decent radio station, but now I can’t get the >wheels on my stroller to all go in the same >direction.  I’ve graduated from university, >written newspaper articles, and won awards, but >can’t figure out how to get carrot stains out of >the carpet.  I used to debate with my friends >about politics, but now we discuss the merits of >cloth versus disposables. >And when did I stop talking in sentences that >had more than five words? >So, in response to my husband’s inquiry, yes, >I did do something today. In fact, I am one step >closer to one of life’s greatest >accomplishments.> No, I did not cure AIDS or >forge World Peace, >but I did hold a miracle in my arms. Two, in >fact.  My children are my great accomplishment, >and the opportunity to raise them is my greatest >challenge.  I don’t know if my children will grow >up to be great leaders or world-class >brainsurgeons. Frankly, I don’t care, as long as >they grow up to be happy and fulfilled.  They are >my greatest joys, even though I sometimes cry >myself to sleep at night in frustration. >The point is, that today I got to watch my >children take another step on the great journey >of Life, and I even got to point out some of the >sights along the way. >As challenging as parenthood is, it is also >equally rewarding, because we are using all our >wisdom, our talent and skills to help forge a new >person. It is this person, these people, who, in >turn, will use their gifts to create our future. >So every nursery rhyme I recite, every swing I >push,every little hand I hold is SOMETHING!  And >I did it today. Loved it so much that I had to >share it

Response:

Wonderful! My husband has spent time helping me do all this and more during a bout of unemployment so he knows.  His only question is how can I watch childrens programing all day and remain sane… Georga – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > This is being forwarded from a list I’m on…thought some here might enjoy > it also… > Lisa > My husband came home today and saw me sitting > on the couch, toddler on one knee, and baby > nursing on the opposite breast.  I was trying to > turn the pages of a book with the hand not > attached to the infant, while listening for the > sound of the stove buzzer, which would indicate > that tonight’s pork chops were at the stage > between "well-done" and "the dog gets tonight’s > entree". > My husband looked at me innocently, and asked > "So, did you do anything today?" It’s a good > thing that most of my appendages were otherwise > engaged, > as I was unable to jump up and throttle him > to death. This was probably for the best, as I > assume that asking a stupid question is not > grounds for murder in this country. > Let me back up a bit, and explain what led me > to this point in my life. I was not always > bordering on the brink of insanity.  On the > contrary, a mere four years ago, I had a good > job, steady income, and a vehiclethat could NOT > seat a professional sports team, and me, > comfortably.  I > watched television shows that were not hosted >  by singing puppets. I went to bed later than > nine o’clock at night. I preferred sex to > sleeping in.  I laughed at those people who drove > halfway across the country hauling a tent > trailer, three > screaming kids, a drooling dog, and called it a > holiday.  Now I have become one of them! > What happened?  The stick turned blue! > I have traded in my Victoria’s Secrets lingerie > for cotton briefs and a firm support nursing bra. > Good-bye, Garth Brooks.  Hello, Sharon, Lois and > Bram.  My idea of privacy is getting to  use the > bathroom without a two-year old banging on the > door, and the baby spinning the toilet paper roll > from my lap. And I finally understand that the > term "Stay-At-Home Mom" does not refer to a > parent who no longer works outside the house, but > rather to one who never seems to get out the > front door. > So here I sit, children in hand, wondering how to > answer my beloved husband. DID I DO ANYTHING > TODAY?  Well, I think I did, although not much > seems to have gotten accomplished. I shared > breakfast in bed with a handsome young man.  Of > course, the breakfast consisted of a bowl of > oatmeal and leftover cookie crumbs found between > the sheets.  The handsome young man is about > thirty-four inches tall and only gets really > excited at the sight of purple dinosaurs, toy > trucks and french fries. I got to take a relaxing > stroll in the woods. Of course, I was on the > lookout for frogs and lizards, and had to > stop and smell the dandelions along the way. I > successfully washed one load of laundry, moved > the load that was in the washer into the dryer, > and the dryer load into the basket.  The load > that was in the basket is now spread out on the > bed, awaiting my bedtime decision to actually put > the clothes away or merely move them to the top > of the dresser. > I read two or three classics.  Of course, Dickens > and Shakespeare cannot take credit for these > works, as we have moved on to the works of Seuss > and Munsch. I  don’t think I will be making any > trips to the Adult Section of my local library > anytime soon. > In between, I dusted, wiped, organized and > rearranged. I kissed away the owies and washed > away the tears.  I scolded, praised, hugged, and > tested my patience, all before noon. > DID I DO ANYTHING TODAY?  You betcha! I will now > understand what people mean when they say that > parenthood isthe hardest job they will ever have. >  In my LBD (life before diapers) I was able to > teach young minds how to divide fractions and > write complex sentences, but I am unable to teach > a strong willed two-year-old how to use the > toilet. I was once able to navigate urban streets > while talking on the car phone and looking for a > decent radio station, but now I can’t get the > wheels on my stroller to all go in the same > direction.  I’ve graduated from university, > written newspaper articles, and won awards, but > can’t figure out how to get carrot stains out of > the carpet.  I used to debate with my friends > about politics, but now we discuss the merits of > cloth versus disposables. > And when did I stop talking in sentences that > had more than five words? > So, in response to my husband’s inquiry, yes, > I did do something today. In fact, I am one step > closer to one of life’s greatest > accomplishments.> No, I did not cure AIDS or > forge World Peace, > but I did hold a miracle in my arms. Two, in > fact.  My children are my great accomplishment, > and the opportunity to raise them is my greatest > challenge.  I don’t know if my children will grow > up to be great leaders or world-class > brainsurgeons. Frankly, I don’t care, as long as > they grow up to be happy and fulfilled.  They are > my greatest joys, even though I sometimes cry > myself to sleep at night in frustration. > The point is, that today I got to watch my > children take another step on the great journey > of Life, and I even got to point out some of the > sights along the way. > As challenging as parenthood is, it is also > equally rewarding, because we are using all our > wisdom, our talent and skills to help forge a new > person. It is this person, these people, who, in > turn, will use their gifts to create our future. > So every nursery rhyme I recite, every swing I > push,every little hand I hold is SOMETHING!  And > I did it today. Loved it so much that I had to > share it

Response:

What Did I Do Today? Today I left some dishes dirty, The bed got made around 3:30. The diapers soaked a little longer, The odor grew a little stronger. The crumbs I spilled the day before Are staring at me from the floor. The fingerprints there on the wall Will likely be there still next fall. The dirty streaks on those windowpanes Will still be there next time it rains. Shame on you, you sit and say, Just what did you do today? I held a baby till she slept, I held a toddler while he wept. I played a game of hide and seek, I squeezed a toy so it would squeak. I pulled a wagon, sang a song, Taught a child right from wrong. What did I do this whole day through? Not much that shows, I guess that’ s true. Unless you think that what I’ve done, Might be important to someone With deep brown eyes and soft blonde hair, If that is true… I’ve done my share. —Share what you know. Learn what you don’t.—

Response:

>This is being forwarded from a list I’m on…thought some here might enjoy >it also… >Lisa

Thanks Lisa!  That was great!!! Sharon

Response:

> This is being forwarded from a list I’m on…thought some here might enjoy > it also… > Lisa

Wow, that’s was great Lisa.  I’m forwarding it to every mother I know — Paige GO LEAFS!!! proud to be Outlandish When you are finally holding all the cards, why does everyone else decide to play chess.

Response:

My husband stays home with the kids at night (4 hours/night 4 days/week) while I am at school so now he knows what I do all day! But he gets to play with them more, because I do the cooking and about half the cleaning. Marie – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >This is being forwarded from a list I’m on…thought some here might enjoy >it also… >Lisa >My husband came home today and saw me sitting >on the couch, toddler on one knee, and baby >nursing on the opposite breast.  I was trying to >turn the pages of a book with the hand not >attached to the infant, while listening for the >sound of the stove buzzer, which would indicate >that tonight’s pork chops were at the stage >between "well-done" and "the dog gets tonight’s >entree". >My husband looked at me innocently, and asked >"So, did you do anything today?" It’s a good >thing that most of my appendages were otherwise >engaged, >as I was unable to jump up and throttle him >to death. This was probably for the best, as I >assume that asking a stupid question is not >grounds for murder in this country. >Let me back up a bit, and explain what led me >to this point in my life. I was not always >bordering on the brink of insanity.  On the >contrary, a mere four years ago, I had a good >job, steady income, and a vehiclethat could NOT >seat a professional sports team, and me, >comfortably.  I >watched television shows that were not hosted > by singing puppets. I went to bed later than >nine o’clock at night. I preferred sex to >sleeping in.  I laughed at those people who drove >halfway across the country hauling a tent >trailer, three >screaming kids, a drooling dog, and called it a >holiday.  Now I have become one of them! >What happened?  The stick turned blue! >I have traded in my Victoria’s Secrets lingerie >for cotton briefs and a firm support nursing bra. >Good-bye, Garth Brooks.  Hello, Sharon, Lois and >Bram.  My idea of privacy is getting to  use the >bathroom without a two-year old banging on the >door, and the baby spinning the toilet paper roll >from my lap. And I finally understand that the >term "Stay-At-Home Mom" does not refer to a >parent who no longer works outside the house, but >rather to one who never seems to get out the >front door. >So here I sit, children in hand, wondering how to >answer my beloved husband. DID I DO ANYTHING >TODAY?  Well, I think I did, although not much >seems to have gotten accomplished. I shared >breakfast in bed with a handsome young man.  Of >course, the breakfast consisted of a bowl of >oatmeal and leftover cookie crumbs found between >the sheets.  The handsome young man is about >thirty-four inches tall and only gets really >excited at the sight of purple dinosaurs, toy >trucks and french fries. I got to take a relaxing >stroll in the woods. Of course, I was on the >lookout for frogs and lizards, and had to >stop and smell the dandelions along the way. I >successfully washed one load of laundry, moved >the load that was in the washer into the dryer, >and the dryer load into the basket.  The load >that was in the basket is now spread out on the >bed, awaiting my bedtime decision to actually put >the clothes away or merely move them to the top >of the dresser. >I read two or three classics.  Of course, Dickens >and Shakespeare cannot take credit for these >works, as we have moved on to the works of Seuss >and Munsch. I  don’t think I will be making any >trips to the Adult Section of my local library >anytime soon. >In between, I dusted, wiped, organized and >rearranged. I kissed away the owies and washed >away the tears.  I scolded, praised, hugged, and >tested my patience, all before noon. >DID I DO ANYTHING TODAY?  You betcha! I will now >understand what people mean when they say that >parenthood isthe hardest job they will ever have. > In my LBD (life before diapers) I was able to >teach young minds how to divide fractions and >write complex sentences, but I am unable to teach >a strong willed two-year-old how to use the >toilet. I was once able to navigate urban streets >while talking on the car phone and looking for a >decent radio station, but now I can’t get the >wheels on my stroller to all go in the same >direction.  I’ve graduated from university, >written newspaper articles, and won awards, but >can’t figure out how to get carrot stains out of >the carpet.  I used to debate with my friends >about politics, but now we discuss the merits of >cloth versus disposables. >And when did I stop talking in sentences that >had more than five words? >So, in response to my husband’s inquiry, yes, >I did do something today. In fact, I am one step >closer to one of life’s greatest >accomplishments.> No, I did not cure AIDS or >forge World Peace, >but I did hold a miracle in my arms. Two, in >fact.  My children are my great accomplishment, >and the opportunity to raise them is my greatest >challenge.  I don’t know if my children will grow >up to be great leaders or world-class >brainsurgeons. Frankly, I don’t care, as long as >they grow up to be happy and fulfilled.  They are >my greatest joys, even though I sometimes cry >myself to sleep at night in frustration. >The point is, that today I got to watch my >children take another step on the great journey >of Life, and I even got to point out some of the >sights along the way. >As challenging as parenthood is, it is also >equally rewarding, because we are using all our >wisdom, our talent and skills to help forge a new >person. It is this person, these people, who, in >turn, will use their gifts to create our future. >So every nursery rhyme I recite, every swing I >push,every little hand I hold is SOMETHING!  And >I did it today. Loved it so much that I had to >share it

Response:

I really enjoyed that!  Thanks for sharing Debbie C – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >This is being forwarded from a list I’m on…thought some here might enjoy >it also… >Lisa >My husband came home today and saw me sitting >on the couch, toddler on one knee, and baby >nursing on the opposite breast.  I was trying to >turn the pages of a book with the hand not >attached to the infant, while listening for the >sound of the stove buzzer, which would indicate >that tonight’s pork chops were at the stage >between "well-done" and "the dog gets tonight’s >entree". >My husband looked at me innocently, and asked >"So, did you do anything today?" It’s a good >thing that most of my appendages were otherwise >engaged, >as I was unable to jump up and throttle him >to death. This was probably for the best, as I >assume that asking a stupid question is not >grounds for murder in this country. >Let me back up a bit, and explain what led me >to this point in my life. I was not always >bordering on the brink of insanity.  On the >contrary, a mere four years ago, I had a good >job, steady income, and a vehiclethat could NOT >seat a professional sports team, and me, >comfortably.  I >watched television shows that were not hosted > by singing puppets. I went to bed later than >nine o’clock at night. I preferred sex to >sleeping in.  I laughed at those people who drove >halfway across the country hauling a tent >trailer, three >screaming kids, a drooling dog, and called it a >holiday.  Now I have become one of them! >What happened?  The stick turned blue! >I have traded in my Victoria’s Secrets lingerie >for cotton briefs and a firm support nursing bra. >Good-bye, Garth Brooks.  Hello, Sharon, Lois and >Bram.  My idea of privacy is getting to  use the >bathroom without a two-year old banging on the >door, and the baby spinning the toilet paper roll >from my lap. And I finally understand that the >term "Stay-At-Home Mom" does not refer to a >parent who no longer works outside the house, but >rather to one who never seems to get out the >front door. >So here I sit, children in hand, wondering how to >answer my beloved husband. DID I DO ANYTHING >TODAY?  Well, I think I did, although not much >seems to have gotten accomplished. I shared >breakfast in bed with a handsome young man.  Of >course, the breakfast consisted of a bowl of >oatmeal and leftover cookie crumbs found between >the sheets.  The handsome young man is about >thirty-four inches tall and only gets really >excited at the sight of purple dinosaurs, toy >trucks and french fries. I got to take a relaxing >stroll in the woods. Of course, I was on the >lookout for frogs and lizards, and had to >stop and smell the dandelions along the way. I >successfully washed one load of laundry, moved >the load that was in the washer into the dryer, >and the dryer load into the basket.  The load >that was in the basket is now spread out on the >bed, awaiting my bedtime decision to actually put >the clothes away or merely move them to the top >of the dresser. >I read two or three classics.  Of course, Dickens >and Shakespeare cannot take credit for these >works, as we have moved on to the works of Seuss >and Munsch. I  don’t think I will be making any >trips to the Adult Section of my local library >anytime soon. >In between, I dusted, wiped, organized and >rearranged. I kissed away the owies and washed >away the tears.  I scolded, praised, hugged, and >tested my patience, all before noon. >DID I DO ANYTHING TODAY?  You betcha! I will now >understand what people mean when they say that >parenthood isthe hardest job they will ever have. > In my LBD (life before diapers) I was able to >teach young minds how to divide fractions and >write complex sentences, but I am unable to teach >a strong willed two-year-old how to use the >toilet. I was once able to navigate urban streets >while talking on the car phone and looking for a >decent radio station, but now I can’t get the >wheels on my stroller to all go in the same >direction.  I’ve graduated from university, >written newspaper articles, and won awards, but >can’t figure out how to get carrot stains out of >the carpet.  I used to debate with my friends >about politics, but now we discuss the merits of >cloth versus disposables. >And when did I stop talking in sentences that >had more than five words? >So, in response to my husband’s inquiry, yes, >I did do something today. In fact, I am one step >closer to one of life’s greatest >accomplishments.> No, I did not cure AIDS or >forge World Peace, >but I did hold a miracle in my arms. Two, in >fact.  My children are my great accomplishment, >and the opportunity to raise them is my greatest >challenge.  I don’t know if my children will grow >up to be great leaders or world-class >brainsurgeons. Frankly, I don’t care, as long as >they grow up to be happy and fulfilled.  They are >my greatest joys, even though I sometimes cry >myself to sleep at night in frustration. >The point is, that today I got to watch my >children take another step on the great journey >of Life, and I even got to point out some of the >sights along the way. >As challenging as parenthood is, it is also >equally rewarding, because we are using all our >wisdom, our talent and skills to help forge a new >person. It is this person, these people, who, in >turn, will use their gifts to create our future. >So every nursery rhyme I recite, every swing I >push,every little hand I hold is SOMETHING!  And >I did it today. Loved it so much that I had to >share it

Response:

This is being forwarded from a list I’m on…thought some here might enjoy it also… Lisa My husband came home today and saw me sitting on the couch, toddler on one knee, and baby nursing on the opposite breast.  I was trying to turn the pages of a book with the hand not attached to the infant, while listening for the sound of the stove buzzer, which would indicate that tonight’s pork chops were at the stage between "well-done" and "the dog gets tonight’s entree". My husband looked at me innocently, and asked "So, did you do anything today?" It’s a good thing that most of my appendages were otherwise engaged, as I was unable to jump up and throttle him to death. This was probably for the best, as I assume that asking a stupid question is not grounds for murder in this country. Let me back up a bit, and explain what led me to this point in my life. I was not always bordering on the brink of insanity.  On the contrary, a mere four years ago, I had a good job, steady income, and a vehiclethat could NOT seat a professional sports team, and me, comfortably.  I watched television shows that were not hosted  by singing puppets. I went to bed later than nine o’clock at night. I preferred sex to sleeping in.  I laughed at those people who drove halfway across the country hauling a tent trailer, three screaming kids, a drooling dog, and called it a holiday.  Now I have become one of them! What happened?  The stick turned blue! I have traded in my Victoria’s Secrets lingerie for cotton briefs and a firm support nursing bra. Good-bye, Garth Brooks.  Hello, Sharon, Lois and Bram.  My idea of privacy is getting to  use the bathroom without a two-year old banging on the door, and the baby spinning the toilet paper roll from my lap. And I finally understand that the term "Stay-At-Home Mom" does not refer to a parent who no longer works outside the house, but rather to one who never seems to get out the front door. So here I sit, children in hand, wondering how to answer my beloved husband. DID I DO ANYTHING TODAY?  Well, I think I did, although not much seems to have gotten accomplished. I shared breakfast in bed with a handsome young man.  Of course, the breakfast consisted of a bowl of oatmeal and leftover cookie crumbs found between the sheets.  The handsome young man is about thirty-four inches tall and only gets really excited at the sight of purple dinosaurs, toy trucks and french fries. I got to take a relaxing stroll in the woods. Of course, I was on the lookout for frogs and lizards, and had to stop and smell the dandelions along the way. I successfully washed one load of laundry, moved the load that was in the washer into the dryer, and the dryer load into the basket.  The load that was in the basket is now spread out on the bed, awaiting my bedtime decision to actually put the clothes away or merely move them to the top of the dresser. I read two or three classics.  Of course, Dickens and Shakespeare cannot take credit for these works, as we have moved on to the works of Seuss and Munsch. I  don’t think I will be making any trips to the Adult Section of my local library anytime soon. In between, I dusted, wiped, organized and rearranged. I kissed away the owies and washed away the tears.  I scolded, praised, hugged, and tested my patience, all before noon. DID I DO ANYTHING TODAY?  You betcha! I will now understand what people mean when they say that parenthood isthe hardest job they will ever have.  In my LBD (life before diapers) I was able to teach young minds how to divide fractions and write complex sentences, but I am unable to teach a strong willed two-year-old how to use the toilet. I was once able to navigate urban streets while talking on the car phone and looking for a decent radio station, but now I can’t get the wheels on my stroller to all go in the same direction.  I’ve graduated from university, written newspaper articles, and won awards, but can’t figure out how to get carrot stains out of the carpet.  I used to debate with my friends about politics, but now we discuss the merits of cloth versus disposables. And when did I stop talking in sentences that had more than five words? So, in response to my husband’s inquiry, yes, I did do something today. In fact, I am one step closer to one of life’s greatest accomplishments.> No, I did not cure AIDS or forge World Peace, but I did hold a miracle in my arms. Two, in fact.  My children are my great accomplishment, and the opportunity to raise them is my greatest challenge.  I don’t know if my children will grow up to be great leaders or world-class brainsurgeons. Frankly, I don’t care, as long as they grow up to be happy and fulfilled.  They are my greatest joys, even though I sometimes cry myself to sleep at night in frustration. The point is, that today I got to watch my children take another step on the great journey of Life, and I even got to point out some of the sights along the way. As challenging as parenthood is, it is also equally rewarding, because we are using all our wisdom, our talent and skills to help forge a new person. It is this person, these people, who, in turn, will use their gifts to create our future. So every nursery rhyme I recite, every swing I push,every little hand I hold is SOMETHING!  And I did it today. Loved it so much that I had to share it

Response: